Why doesn't Ed have a girlfriend?

Because Sheeran

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What should you do when your girlfriend starts smoking??

Slow down and maybe use some lube...

What does a cow call his girlfriend?

His significant udder.

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What did the cat do when he didn't want to watch the movie?

He paws-ed it!

What happened to Ed's girlfriend?

Sheeran

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Why doesn't Ed have a girlfriend?

Because Sheeran

What happened to Ed's girlfriend?

Sheeran