How did the emu feel when his friends disowned him for being too big?

Ostrich-sized.

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Friend Jokes More Friend Jokes

What did 'b' say to his friend 'e' after 'e' saved his life?

AY E! I O U edit: added Y

What do you rate Megan Fox out of 10?

Friend: 9 Me: 9? I'll give her one..

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

Why did the mountain climber quit halfway through his climb?

He really wasn't feeling up to it.

How many true friends do you believe you have?

Me: Define "true friend." Shrink: Someone you feel you can tell anything. Me: 11,419.

Emu Jokes More Emu Jokes

What is the square route of an EMU?

A RADICAL EMU!!!!!!

What did the emu say to the nurse?

Mend her bones or walk the plank