How do you buy hair?

You have toupee

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Why don't Canadians do well on Wheel of Fortune?

Because the host gets confused when they say "I'd to buy a vowel eh."

How did SkyMall go bankrupt?

I bought all my wife's birthday presents there before she left me.

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What does Batman use to wash his hair?

Conditioner Gordon.

Why didn't the Aztec get their hair cut?

They didn't like the barbershop Cortez.

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How do you buy hair?

You have toupee

What did the bra say to the toupee?

You go on ahead, I'll hold these two up.