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How many babies does it take to shingle a roof?

It depends on how thinly you slice them.

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Depend Jokes More Depend Jokes

What happens when you scare an old lady?

Depends.

What's the difference between Tim Howard and Jesus?

Jesus had 11 guys he could depend on.

Roof Jokes More Roof Jokes

What did the Mexican say when his roof fell on him?

Get off me Holmes!

Why did the blonde climb up to the roof of the bar?

She heard that the drinks were on the house.

Slice Jokes More Slice Jokes

What's the difference between a slice of toast and an Iraqi..?

You can make soldiers out of a slice of toast

What did one slice of bread say to the other at the end of a game of chess?

It's stale, mate.

Shingle Jokes More Shingle Jokes

What do wives and shingles have in common?

If you don't nail them right, they'll end up at your neighbor's.

Why do strippers hate roofers?

They always pay in shingles.