How many Hal 9000 computer systems does it take to change a lightbulb?

I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I cannot do that

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Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many mitochondria does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, they're the powerhouse of the cell.

How many Coldplay members does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just one, but he has to see Radiohead do it first.

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many film directors does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one but he wants to do it thirty-two times and when he's done everyone says that his last light bulb was much better.

How many US Congress members does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one. They just hold it still and wait for the world to revolve around them.