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How many US Congress members does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one. They just hold it still and wait for the world to revolve around them.

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World Jokes More World Jokes

What are the four fastest hands in the world?

When it slips out.

What is the thinnest book in the world?

What Men Know About Women

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many Amish people does it take to change a lightbulb?

A what?

How many IT professionals does it take to change a lightbulb?

Have you tried turning it off and back on?

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

What has 42 teeth and holds back the incredible Hulk?

My Zipper.

How do you stop a thundering herd of Apes?

Hold up your arm and say "Go back you didn't say 'May I'"

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many radical feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?

That's not funny.

How many engineers do you need to change a lightbulb?

You can take as many as you want but they will only give you the screwing direction.

Wait Jokes More Wait Jokes

What did the doctor say to the midget waiting in the lobby?

You're just going to have to be a little patient.

What spends a good 3 hours a day in my hand?

Hint* it starts with P and ends with S. Pens! :D... wait what were YOU THINKING!!!

Revolve Jokes More Revolve Jokes

How many pregnant women does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just one. She holds it while the world revolves around her.

How many Bill Gateses does it take to change a light bulb?

One. He puts the bulb in and lets the world revolve around him.

Congress Jokes More Congress Jokes

What's the difference between Congress and a circus?

One is a Cunning array of Stunts...

Why is Congress like a cold?

Because sometimes the ayes (eyes) have it and sometimes the no's (nose).