What would you call the Easter egg roll if Bernie Sanders became president?

Weekend at Bernie's.

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President Jokes More President Jokes

Why should we elect Gabe Newell as President of the United States?

So there won't be a World War III.

Who is the president of the trees?

BarkOak Palma

Bernie Sanders Jokes More Bernie Sanders Jokes

What do you call wood-smoothing equipment that's hot to the touch?

Bernie Sanders

What's the difference between Bernie Sanders and a free lunch?

Bernie Sanders exists.

Bernie Jokes More Bernie Jokes

Why does Bernie know he'll win the elections?

Because his good friend Nostradamus told him he would.

Why does Bernie always hold the podium while giving a speech?

It's tough to stand on your own when you have no spine.

Weekend Jokes More Weekend Jokes

Why do pessimists always think it's the weekend?

Because every day is a sadder-day.

What do vegetables that go to college do on the weekends?

They Turnip