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What do you call wood-smoothing equipment that's hot to the touch?

Bernie Sanders

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Touch Jokes More Touch Jokes

When is it time for bed at the Neverland Ranch?

When the big hand touches the little hand.

What do you call an IT teacher who touches up his students?

A PDF file.

Bernie Sanders Jokes More Bernie Sanders Jokes

What's Bernie Sanders's favorite insurance company?

Progressive

Why won't Bernie Sanders win the rational election?

Because he's two radical.

Smooth Jokes More Smooth Jokes

Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkley?

Because if they were small, white, and smooth they'd be Asprin.

What do you call wood-smoothing equipment that's hot to the touch?

Bernie Sanders