What do you call wood-smoothing equipment that's hot to the touch?

Bernie Sanders

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What's the scariest thing a blind person can read in Braille?

Danger: Do not touch

Why can a T-Rex not touch his toes?

Because he's extinct

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Why did the two chickens cross the road?

To avoid debating Bernie Sanders

What do you call sandpaper on fire?

Bernie Sanders

Smooth Jokes More Smooth Jokes

Why are monsters huge and hairy and ugly?

Because if they were small and round and smooth they'd be M&M's

Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkley?

Because if they were small, white, and smooth they'd be Asprin.