How much would you say you read the Bible?

Well, I don't read it religiously." Bud-dum tss, I hate myself.

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What's someone who hates underwear's favorite song?

Free Ballin - Foo Fighters

Why do dentists only want to be awarded with paper certificates?

They hate plaque buildup.

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When is the Bible accurate?

When it's thrown from a short distance.

What's the difference between a cow and The Bible?

You can't milk a cow for 2,000 years.

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Who Conquers All obviously, this is read in the man's grizzled voice What's the difference between your mother and a motorcycle?

When I ride a motorcycle... I wear protection.

What did Plaxico Burress say when he read Colin Kaepernick's Tweets?

Man, this guy just keeps shooting himself in the foot".