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What are the chances of familiarising myself with a semiaquatic amphibian to the point of ownership?

My newt.

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Point Jokes More Point Jokes

Why is there no point in sending medicine to Athiopia?

Because the instructions usually say: "Take after meals."

What is long and yellow and always points north?

A magnetic banana.

Chance Jokes More Chance Jokes

What is the chance we are alone in the universe?

Professor: Astronomical.

What can run out before you've had a chance to use it?

Slaves.

Ownership Jokes More Ownership Jokes

What are the chances of familiarising myself with a semiaquatic amphibian to the point of ownership?

My newt.

What's 12 inches long, stiff, full of sperm and can make a girl scream?

The sock under my bed. (I don't remember where I heard it. Can't claim ownership.)

Newt Jokes More Newt Jokes

What are the chances of familiarising myself with a semiaquatic amphibian to the point of ownership?

My newt.

Why do you call it Tiny?

Because it's my newt.