Point Jokes

How do you call it when an egg is on point?

Egg zactly!

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

$19.99

What's the different between a knife and a feminist?

A knife has a point

Who is better? The 3rd wave feminist or the pencil?

The pencil is better. It has a point.

Why did Hillary cross the road?

What difference, at this point, does it make?

Why do composers win debates?

Because when their opponent makes a point, they always respond with a valid counterpoint.

When drinking liquor while watching baseball, at what point will you be the most drunk?

Bottom of the fifth, of course.

What are the chances of familiarising myself with a semiaquatic amphibian to the point of ownership?

My newt.

Why did the blind man use chopsticks?

Because he couldn't see the point in forks.

What do you call someone who points out the obvious?

Someone who points out the obvious.

Why did the circle stop arguing with the two intersecting lines?

Because they had a point

Why did the small Egyptian climb to the top of the pyramid?

He couldn't see the point.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

$19.99

What's the advantage of being black in Africa vs black in America?

Nobody can point at your shoes and say "What are thoooooooooose?!"

Why does nobody talk to circles?

Because there is no point!

How many nihilists does it take to change a lightbulb?

They don't see the point and just sit in the dark.

Why did Wile E. Coyote have a "Detour" sign pointing to the edge of a cliff?

To throw the Roadrunner off.

What's the point of going to somebodys funeral?

It's not like they are coming to yours.

What do you call a lawyer up to his neck in cement?

Not enough cement EDIT: Okay thanks for pointing out that I messed up the wording but the joke is supposed to be the funny part

How many points do you get if you hit a golfer?

Fore.

Why buy an invisible knife?

I don't see the point

Why did the guy not draw a circle?

Because there was no point.

Where does it hurt?

Me: *Points to heart* Nurse: Awwww that is so cute! Me. *COLLAPSES FROM HEART ATTACK*

Everyday Deserves a Joke

$19.99

Why can't a nihilist use a pencil?

Because they cant find the point.

What did the blind guy say to the deaf guy?

I hear what your saying, but I don't see your point

Why's the couch smell like pee?

Flashback to me watching The Ring alone Me: *points at son* I think someone had another "accident."

When is a dog most impolite?

When he points.

What is long and yellow and always points north?

A magnetic banana.

What's the difference between feminists and a pencil?

A pencil has a point.

Why won't a witch wear a flat cap?

Because there's no point in it.

What's the difference between a triangle and Manchester United?

A triangle has three points

What's the similarity between Bruce Jenner and a Pharaoh?

At some point they turned into Mummys

What's yellow and always points to the north?

A magnetic banana.

Why don't witches wear a flat cap?

There's no point to it

Why did the witch lose her way?

Because her hat was pointing in the wrong direction.

Why should you not argue with a decimal?

Because decimals always have a point.

Which machine at the gym should I use to impress beautiful women?

He pointed outside and said "The ATM machine" c/o /u/jubileo5

What do witches use pencil sharpeners for?

To keep their hats pointed.

How many redditors does it take to get a joke?

Three. One to get the punchline, and one to point out the math is wrong.

What is the point of owning a fish?

They are just furniture with the ability to die.

How many redditors does it take to point out a repost?

All of them.

What did the Math book say to the pencil?

I see your point I've got a lot of problems.

What did the pencil say to the sharpener?

Stop going in circles and get to the point.

What is the difference between arguing with a knife and arguing with your girlfriend?

The knife has a point.

How can you tell that a straight pin is confused?

Just look at it. It's headed in One Direction and pointed in the other.

Whats the point of calling it "secret Santa"?

Everyone knows that the person who gave you the gift is Santa.

Who run da world?

Points mic at me* ME: having briefly heard the song once before...squirrels

You might also enjoy:

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What did Obi-wan say to Luke at the Chinese restaurant?

Use the fork, Luke.

What evil do the USA and Darth Vader have in common?

Using imperial units.

3rd Jokes More 3rd Jokes

Why doesn't Gabe Newell have kids?

He can't get to 3rd base

What do they call traffic laws in 3rd world countries?

Guidelines

Knife Jokes More Knife Jokes

What's the difference between toilet paper and a knife?

Oh, you don't know I won't ask you to wipe my bum then.

What's the most useless thing about a knife?

The 'K'

Toilet Jokes More Toilet Jokes

What goes in God's Toilet?

Holy crap.

What is the best celebration to have in a French Toilet?

A biday party!!

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What's angry most of the time and wants you to stick something hard in it?

An outlet

What were the martyr's last words?

I believe in peace in our time

Hillary Jokes More Hillary Jokes

What's Hillary's thoughts about her campaign?

Iran, Iraq, I lost

What is the name of the event in which Hillary supporters move out of the US?

A start.

Opponent Jokes More Opponent Jokes

Why do composers win debates?

Because when their opponent makes a point, they always respond with a valid counterpoint.

What did the armless warrior say to his opponent before battle?

You're about to meet da-feet!

Argue Jokes More Argue Jokes

Who is this "one"?

And why is he always arguing with people?

What do you call two beer drinkers arguing about sea turtles?

Lager-heads at loggerheads about Loggerheads.