Baseball Jokes

When drinking liquor while watching baseball, at what point will you be the most drunk?

Bottom of the fifth, of course.

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Why can't Bane play baseball?

He always breaks the bat.

Why didn't the panda use a glove when playing baseball?

Because he caught everything bear handed!

What do Cooperstown and Woodstock have in common?

Cooperstown is where Baseball wasn't invented and Woodstock is where the festival didn't happen.

Why don't matches play baseball?

One strike, and they're out.

What animal is best at hitting a baseball?

A bat!

What do you get when you cross a baseball with a turkey?

A fowl ball!

Why don't orphans play baseball?

They have no home to run to

Why did the farmer call his horse Baseball?

Because it's covered with horsehide!

Why are orphans unable to play baseball?

They've never known what home is.

What kind of baseball do burgers play?

Ketchup baseball!

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Which cheeseburger makes a big hit in baseball?

A double!

Who's bad at baseball but fun at parties?

A pitcher filled with margaritas!

What's the difference between a firstborn prince and a baseball?

A baseball is thrown to the air.

What do you call a crab that plays baseball?

A pinch hitter.

Why can't an orphan play baseball?

Because he can't run home

Why couldn't The Doctor play baseball?

They couldn't figure out Who was on first (Sorry, if this has been submitted before, im new here)

What is Batman's favorite sport?

Baseball.

What do you get when you combine Soccer and Baseball?

Golbat.

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What game do enemy naval officers play in the sauna?

Battleshvitz

How many blondes does it take to play Hide and Seek?

One.

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What's the difference between golf and Lady Godiva?

One is a hunt on a course.

Why is golf named "golf"?

Because all the other fore letter words were taken (Thanks to... this now makes sense...)

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What does the pirates 5 trailer and the iPhone 7 have in common?

There's no jack

Why does she keep cleaning the floors?

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What's brown and very bad for your dental health?

A baseball bat.

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What do you call a burger made from 50% beef and 50% veal?

Half Calf

Which burgers love to act?

Ham-burgers!

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What did the motivational speaker say to the duct?

You conduit!

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What did the pro bono plastic surgeon say to their patient on Dec 31st?

Happy new ears Eve!

What time of day was Adam born?

Just a little before Eve

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Why did the bowling pins stop working?

They went on strike!

Why did the rabbits go on strike?

They wanted a better celery!