What did Mustafa's dad say after he founded Turkey?

Attaturk.

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What did the angry man sing when he found his slippers chewed up by the new puppy?

I must throw that doggie out the window!"!

How does one find out the sensitivity of a gentleman's balls?

Test tickles

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Why was the United Nations concerned when the waitress dropped the platter on Thanksgiving?

It meant the fall of Turkey, the ruin of Greece, and the breakup of China.

What did the green onion say to the Thanksgiving dinner?

I ain't no chive, Turkey.