What did the candle say when he was down on his luck?

I'm at wick's end.

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Candle Jokes More Candle Jokes

Why did the peace-loving incandescent bulb reject the candle and choose the fluorescent lamp as role model?

The fluorescent lamp wouldn't hurt a fly.

What did the Russian people light their houses with before they started using candles?

Electricity.

Luck Jokes More Luck Jokes

What do you call a stoner that complains about luck?

A Hearthstoner

Where can I find that "4 Out Of 5 People Get Money In Their Birthday Cards" Birthday Card?

I've been checking online with no luck, unless I'm checking the wrong place