What do history teachers make when they want to get together?

Dates!

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Why did the Ape jump off the building?

He wanted to show the world the stuff he was made of!

What did the police officer want from the criminal store?

Just ice.

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What's the best thing about dating twenty nine year olds?

The get all you '90s references.

What does a Texan do if he breaks up with his girl friend?

He dates his other sister.