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What does a guy want more than anything in the world?

It doesn't matter. He has to ask his wife first.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What am I?

I start with a v and every woman has one. She can even use me to get what she wants. What am I? I'll post the answer in 10 minutes.

What did the cat do when he didn't want to watch the movie?

He paws-ed it!

World Jokes More World Jokes

Who was the worlds first capenter?

Eve, she made Adam's banana stand.

How many pregnant women does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just one. She holds it while the world revolves around her.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What's the difference between a paycheck and a D**k?

You don't have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck.

What if I draw a peanut on her napkin?

Wife: Please go wait in the car

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

What is the definition of 'making love'?

Something a woman does while a guy is f***ing her.

What does an IT guys use for birth control?

His personality.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

When asked to provide proof that he had cirrhosis, what did OP do?

OP de-livered.

When your kid asks you (daddy is it time to go crazy?

You don't know what to say until you wife reply's (idk go ask you dad.) what do you say My little joke

Matter Jokes More Matter Jokes

How many cynics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Doesn't matter. Lightbulb is going to die anyway.

What's better: A Parachute Jump or a BJ of a 90 year old?

Doesn't matter... must not look down..