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What did the guy who got fired for always being late say?

It was just a matter of time.

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Time Jokes More Time Jokes

Why was Heisenberg's wife unhappy?

Whenever he had the energy, he didn't have the time.

How can you tell when it's time to go to bed at Michael Jacksons house?

When the big hand touches the little hand

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

What did the fireman say when the church caught on fire?

Holy smoke!

What do you call a cat on fire?

A fur-nace

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

What happend to the guys who kidnapped Batman?

They got Bale.

How would you like to make a donation to our local orphanage?

Dad: yea sure yells up to me son, you live with this guy now!

Matter Jokes More Matter Jokes

How many WoW devs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Doesn't matter. They'll just nerf darkness next patch instead.

What's the best thing about picking up a homeless chick?

It doesn't matter where you drop them off.