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What do you have if you have one fuzzy, green ball in one hand and another fuzzy, green ball in the other hand?

Kermit the Frog's undivided attention.

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Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What has two feet, two hands, two eyes, and two noses?

Two pirates.

How are you feeling Grandpa?

Grandpa: Oh you know with my hands mostly.

Kermit Jokes More Kermit Jokes

What's green and smells like bacon?

Kermit the Frog's fingers.

What's Slimy, cold, green, and smells like pork?

Kermit the Frog's Finger