April Sale - 20% Off

Kermit Jokes

Why can't Kermit and Miss Piggy count to one hundred?

Because every time they get to 69, Miss Piggy gets a frog in her throat.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

What did Kermit the Frog say at Jim Henson's funeral?

Nothing.

What are green and smell like pork?

Kermit's fingers

What's small and green and smells like pork?

Kermit's Finger.

What did Miss Piggy say to Kermit at the end of their first date?

Nothing. She had a frog in her throat.

What's long, green, and smells like bacon?

Kermit's finger

What's green and smells like bacon?

Kermit the Frog's fingers.

What's green and smells like pork?

Kermit the Frog

What is green and smells like bacon?

Kermit's fingers

What's long, green, slimy and smells like pork?

Kermit the Frog's finger

What's green, slimy, and smells like bacon?

Kermit the Frog's fingers.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

What's green, slimy and smells like bacon?

Kermit the frogs finger (shoutout to Hesher)

What do Kermit the Frog'S fingers smell like?

Bacon.

What is long, green, and smells like bacon?

Kermit the Frog's fingers.

What is green and slimy and smells like bacon?

Kermit the Frog's finger...

What do you call Kanye dressed as Kermit?

I don't know, but it's not Yeezy being green.

Whats long and green and smells like pork?

Kermit the frogs finger.

What's slimy cold long and smells like pork?

Kermit the frogs finger...

Whats green, three inches long and smells like bacon?

Kermit the frogs middle finger.

What's Slimy, cold, green, and smells like pork?

Kermit the Frog's Finger

What do Kermit the Frog and Henry the VIII have in common?

Same middle name.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

What's green, slimey and smells like pork?

Kermit's finger.

What is Green...and Smells Like Pork?

Kermit the Frog's Finger!!

What's long, green and smells like bacon?

Kermit the Frog's finger.

What's Kermit the Frog's favorite song?

Whib It" by Devo.

What is Green, Slimy, and smells like Bacon?

Kermit's finger.

What's green, slimy and smells like pork?

Kermit's finger

What do you have when you have two small, green balls in your hand?

Kermit's undivided

Why does Ms. Piggy use honey and vinegar douche?

Because Kermit likes sweet and sour pork.

What's green and furry and smells like pig?

Kermit the Frog's finger

What do Harry Potter and Kermit the Frog have in common?

Hogwarts!

Birthday State of Mind

Birthday State of Mind

What's long, green and smells like pork?

Kermit the frogs fingers

Why doesnt Kermit like elephants?

They always want to play leap-frog with him.

What do Kermit the Frog and David Cameron Have in Common?

They both like to pork.

What's green and smells like ham?

Kermit the Frog's finger

Why does Mrs. Piggy douche with honey?

A. Because Kermit the Frog likes sweet and sour pork.

What do you have if you have one fuzzy, green ball in one hand and another fuzzy, green ball in the other hand?

Kermit the Frog's undivided attention.

Why did Kermit the Frog split with Ms. Piggy?

Because she wouldn't rub it rub it. (blame Happy International Bacon Day)

What do you get if cross a frog with some mist?

Kermit the Fog!

What's long green and smells like pork scratchings?

Kermit the frogs finger.

Why doesn't Kermit the Frog like elephants?

They always want to play leap frog with him

What do Kermit the Frog and Henry the Eighth have in common?

They share the same middle name.

Why did Kermit break up with Miss Piggy?

He wasn't ready for a Kermitment.

You might also enjoy:

Kermitment Jokes More Kermitment Jokes

Why did Mrs. Piggy's relationship fail?

She couldn't stand making Kermitments

Why did Kermit break up with Miss Piggy?

He wasn't ready for a Kermitment.

Kanye Jokes More Kanye Jokes

What do you call a guy who hangs out with musicians?

Kanye

What do you call Kanye dressed as Kermit?

I don't know, but it's not Yeezy being green.

Count Jokes More Count Jokes

Why do women live on average two years longer?

Because the time they spend parking doesnt count.

How does The Terminator lose weight?

By counting Kylereese.

Middle Jokes More Middle Jokes

Why was Snape in the middle of the road?

So you would never know what side he was on.

What sits in the middle of the world wide web?

A very very big spider!

Honey Jokes More Honey Jokes

What's the difference between zombies?

Q: What's the difference between zombies? A: Zombies make honey, and zombies don't.

What do you call a person who helps teach others to fart?

A tooter. (thanks, honey)

Shoutout Jokes More Shoutout Jokes

What do you think Michael Hastings was working on before he died?

Slowing down his car....... shoutout to for this one.

What has eight arms and tells the time?

A clocktopus Shoutout to the popper from my Xmas dinner

End Jokes More End Jokes

What did one slice of bread say to the other at the end of a game of chess?

It's stale, mate.

Why did linkin park wrap themselves up in plastic wrap before they jumped off a cliff?

So in the end they didn't even splatter.

Slimy Jokes More Slimy Jokes

What is Green, Slimy, and smells like Bacon?

Kermit's finger.

What's Slimy, cold, green, and smells like pork?

Kermit the Frog's Finger