Henry Jokes

How did Henry VIIIs wife enter the room?

Amble in (Anne Boyeyn) I made this joke up and am very proud of it

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What do Kermit the Frog and Henry the VIII have in common?

Same middle name.

Why do people think Henry the Sixth was a Norseman?

Because he was a VI KING.

What did Alyssa the duck say to Henry the beaver?

Quack quack!

Who invented fractions?

Henry the 1/8

What do Kermit the Frog and Henry the Eighth have in common?

They share the same middle name.

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Kermit Jokes More Kermit Jokes

What's long, green and smells like pork?

Kermit the frogs fingers

What do you have if you have one fuzzy, green ball in one hand and another fuzzy, green ball in the other hand?

Kermit the Frog's undivided attention.

Second Jokes More Second Jokes

What does a clock do when it's hungry?

It goes back four seconds.

Who will take the second shot in this snooker game?

Find out after the break.

Fraction Jokes More Fraction Jokes

Why did the mathematician celebrate 4/20 on January 5?

Because he knows how to reduce fractions.

Why didn't the rest of the fractions like "mc" very much?

Because he was generally known to be a square(ed).

Chop Jokes More Chop Jokes

Why did the butcher die?

Because he chopped off the wrong sausage.

What's the difference between chopped beef and pea soup?

Everyone can chop beef, but not everyone can pea soup!

Execute Jokes More Execute Jokes

Why is an abortionist good to have on your team?

If you conceive something, they can execute it.

What do you get when you cross Henry VIII and Vlad the Impaler?

Executed.

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Why did the T-Rex fail his business project?

He couldn't make hands meet.

What do you call it when a man has a beer in each hand?

Irish handcuffs.

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

Why does a Canadian with a stutter never run low on batteries?

He always has plenty of double "eh"s, triple "eh"s...

Why isn't the Vice President running for President this year?

Cuz he's Biden his time.

Ghost Jokes More Ghost Jokes

What happened to the ghost who couldn't scare?

He had to join a support group since he couldn't handle his boos.

What do you call the ghost of a chicken?

A poultry-geist.