Why is everyone afraid of Vladimir Putin?

Because Vlad is Putin everyone in their place.

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Let Jokes More Let Jokes

What's the one movie that Rick Astley won't let you borrow?

He's never gonna give you Up.

What's the one thing a hoarder has no trouble letting go of?

Their mind

Putin Jokes More Putin Jokes

What do you call a Soviet ruler dancing on a cracker?

Putin on the Ritz. *ba-dum tsh*

What do you get when you place a Russian leader on a cracker?

Putin on the Ritz.

Place Jokes More Place Jokes

How many theoretical physicists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to hold it in place, another to rotate the universe around it.

What does Michael Bolton say when he walks into an elevator?

This place rocks!

Vlad Jokes More Vlad Jokes

What do you call an asthmatic vampire?

Vlad The Inhaler.

What do you call Dracula when he goes swimming?

Aqua-Vlad

Vladimir Putin Jokes More Vladimir Putin Jokes

How do you start a joke about Vladimir Putin?

By looking over your shoulder.

What did Vladimir Putin say after dropping a smashing one-liner?

Putout