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Why did the knife quit?

It couldn't CUT IT! woohoo! I made this one up while sitting at a buffet table. Enjoy! Skip

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Skip Jokes More Skip Jokes

Why did the paper follow the pencil?

Because it LED THE WAY! I'm on a roll here! this is fun! Skip

How does Rudy Giuliani count to 10?

He doesn't he skips 1-8 and says 9-11 ten times.

Enjoy Jokes More Enjoy Jokes

What is enjoyed if it is wanted and hated if its not?

Democracy

What do you call Charlie Sheen's brother if he were a financial advisor?

Emilio Investevez. Fun game/running joke friends in college used to play. Wondering if Reddit would enjoy the game too.

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

Why can't Sweden win a race?

Because, it always sits right behind the Finnish line

Why did they kick Raggedy Anne out of the toybox?

She kept on sitting on Pinocchio's face yelling "Lie to me... lie to me!"

Quit Jokes More Quit Jokes

Why did the mountain climber quit halfway through his climb?

He really wasn't feeling up to it.

Why did the French chef quit working at the haunted restaurant?

He got crped out.

Knife Jokes More Knife Jokes

What's the different between a knife and a feminist?

A knife has a point

What is the difference between arguing with a knife and arguing with your girlfriend?

The knife has a point.

Cut Jokes More Cut Jokes

Why did the man use a pair of scissors on the rope?

The knife just wasn't cutting it.

Why is the oval office oval shaped?

Because the government cuts corners.