What do you tell your wife with two black eyes?

Nothing, you already told her twice.

This joke may have profanity.
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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did my wife say to me?

I want a divorce

Who has more money than God?

His Ex-Wife.

Black Eye Jokes More Black Eye Jokes

What do you tell a woman with a black eye?

Nothing, she's already been told twice.

What do you say to a girl with a black eye?

Nothing. You already told her.