What's the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?

My girlfriend knows about my wife.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between Bernie Sanders and a free lunch?

Bernie Sanders exists.

What's the difference between a musician and a dead body?

One composes, the other decomposes...

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What did the man say when he got his dancing robot to work?

It twerks!" I don't know how this came to me..

How do you know if an Asian is depressed?

All around them are familiar faces, worn out places, worn out faces.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What else?

You've walked out of wife

What did the sniper say to his wife when he came back from work?

I missed you

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What do a loading bar and my girlfriend have in common?

Both equally inefficient at letting me know when they are actually ready.

What did Humpty Dumpty say to his girlfriend when she said they were breaking up?

Is this some sort of yolk