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What's the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?

My girlfriend knows about my wife.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between god and pilots?

God doesn't think he's a pilot.

Whats the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi?

Dubai don't broadcast the Flintstones but AbuDhabidooooooooo

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Whatever's the matter?

Asked her mother. 'I don't know' replied Mary 'but the teacher thinks I may have caught decimals.'

What is the difference between a dog and a viola?

The dog knows when to stop scratching.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What would you do if i won the lottery?

Wife: I'd take half and leave. Husband: Well here's $6 and you can start packing anytime now.

How many fish did it take to consume my wife?

None. There are no fish under my new gazebo

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What do you call a guitarist without a girlfriend?

Homeless.

How do you know If your girlfriend is Canadian?

Look at her beaver.