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What is the best way to get over a guy/girl?

Truck.

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What's the best way to kick a habit today (day after Thanksgiving)?

Cold turkey.

What is the best way for a pet shop to get business?

Word of mouse.

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What do you get if you play a country music song backwards?

You get your wife back. Your house back. Your truck back. Your dog back...

Why can't truck drivers ever fully retire?

Because they can only semi retire.