What is your favorite thing the new iPhone can do?

Mine is distract me from my own mortality

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Why are the new iPhones so skinny?

To match their hipster owners' jeans.

What is your favorite thing the new iPhone can do?

Mine is distract me from my own mortality

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What is your favorite thing the new iPhone can do?

Mine is distract me from my own mortality

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What is your favorite thing the new iPhone can do?

Mine is distract me from my own mortality

What if the Government invented cheese to distract us from reality?

Gets arrested*