What is your secret weapon against terrorists?

We simply reply......Chuck Norris

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Where do terrorists go for a drink?

The Allahu Ak-Bar.

How do terrorists like their apple pie?

Allah mode.

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Why do all Pirates wear eye patches?

Chuck Norris.

How do you stop an F4 tornado from destroying a town?

A roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris! However, this method will cause more destruction than the tornado.

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What did the CPU say to the RAM?

Sorry to cache you out but I want the data closer. The RAM replied: you're right, "life" is too short.

How many women have you slept with My wife asked me, "How many women have you slept with?

I proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."