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What's been in the works for 7000 days and has barely made any progress?

Me

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Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Why was the man intently watching the bowl of snickers?

He wanted to see who would have the last laugh. back to work...

What's the similarity between a pizza delivery guy and a gynecologist?

They both work with crust.

Progress Jokes More Progress Jokes

What can you say to your trainer that will compliment then on your progress and also be wildly inappropriate?

You make me hard

What's the opposite of pro?

Con. So what's the opposite of progress