What's the best thing to do with a thimble?

Bang it with a drum-thtick!

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What was the best thing Kurt Cobain ever released?

The safety.

What's the best thing about being a Cubs fan?

Not being from Detroit.

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What does a redneck do after she bangs her second cousin?

She quits counting.

What does a screen door and a blonde have in common?

The more you bang it the looser it gets.

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Why is the all-lisp percussion section so quiet?

Because thimbles aren't very loud.

What's the best thing to do with a thimble?

Bang it with a drum-thtick!