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What's the United States favorite brand of shortening?

San Fran Crisco

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United States Jokes More United States Jokes

Who get saved?

The United States of America

Who is faster... Speedy Gonzales or Road Runner?

It depends on how close they are to the Mexico-United States border.

Shorten Jokes More Shorten Jokes

What do you do when your wife is blocking view of the TV?

Go to the kitchen and shorten her chain.

How can you shorten a bed?

Don't sleep long in it.