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What's your emer- She said don't get her anything for Valentine's Day! 911: And you didn't?

No! 911: Placing you in protective custody.

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911 Jokes More 911 Jokes

What is your location?

Me: And you're to blame 911: Pardon Me: You give love a bad name 911: I'm hanging up

How do you prevent 9/11?

Make it a Malaysian airlines flight.

Place Jokes More Place Jokes

How many feminists do you need to replace a lightbulb?

Only 1, she'll hold the bulb in place and wait while the world revolves around her.

How many mottophobics does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. Who do you think broke the filament in the first place

Valentine Day Jokes More Valentine Day Jokes

What did the runaway melon say to the honeydew on Valentine's Day?

I cantaloupe.

What did the French chef give his wife on Valentine's Day?

A hug and a little quiche.