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How did the pig get out of the tree?

The swine flu (joke my dad made up a couple years back during all this)

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Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

What happened to your car?

SON: Transmission is shot. Reverse doesn't work. DAD: Well... SON: Don't- DAD: There's no going back now

Who would win in a fight...your mom or your dad?

From the looks of it, your dad won

Tree Jokes More Tree Jokes

Why shouldn't anybody help cats down a tree?

Because they're stuck up

What happened to the tree when the lumber jack hit on it?

It got all sappy

Pig Jokes More Pig Jokes

What sound do dogs make?

3-year-old: Woof woof. Me: Horses 3: Neigh. Me: Pigs 3: Sizzle sizzle. Somebody understands bacon.

What do you call a pig who overacts?

A ham ham.

Swine Flu Jokes More Swine Flu Jokes

How did they cure the swine flu?

With oinkment.

What happened when pigs started flying?

Everyone got swine flu