Where do cows like to live?

St. Moo-is.

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Who doesn't like Turkey?

Russia.

What do an alcoholic and a necrophile have in common?

They both like to crack open a cold one.

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What do you get from pampering your cow?

Spoiled milk.

What do you call a cow who just gave birth?

Decalfeinated

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What's the difference between a masochist and a blogger?

There's none, both live for the hits.

What kind of dog lives in a particle accelerator?

A Fermilabrador Retriever.