Cow Jokes

Moo." What did the cow saw when she fell into a ditch? "Moo." What did the cow say when she fell onto the electric fence? "Moo." What did the cow say when she got hit by a train? "Why does everything always happen to meeee?" Protip: My dad wrote this joke for me when I was six.

Why did the cow get a job at Google?

Because she was out standing in her field.

Why did the cow slap the bull?

He didn't play well with udders.

What do you call a moving company owned by cows?

A bunch of moooovers.

Where does a cow go to watch a film?

The mooovies. pls tell to friends.

What's the difference between a cow, and 9/11?

You can't milk a cow for 14 years.

What do you call a cow that goes online?

An eMoo.

What goes "Ooooooooooo!"?

A cow with no lips.

What did the cow say when she saw the Dalmatian?

Dam... I got to get in shape!

What's the difference between a cow who makes regular milk and a cow who makes chocolate milk?

A mootation

What do you call a cow who is also a knight?

Sir Loin.

What do you get if you cross history and a cow?

A moo-suem.

What's the difference between a cow and September 11?

You stop milking a cow after 10 years.

How do cows communicate?

Moorse code.

What do you call an Arab who has many cows?

Milk sheikh

What do you get when you push a cow out of a plane?

Ground beef

What do you get when a cow jumps in cold water?

Utter udder shudder.

What do you call it when the only cow on your dairy farm won't produce milk?

Utter despair.

How can you tell a cow isn't listening to you?

Everything you say goes in one ear and out the udder!

What do you call a cow jumping over a barbed wire fence?

An udder disaster.

What did the farmer say after he fed his cows pot?

The Steaks are high.

Why do cows never walk out of horror movies?

They're able to stomach a lot.

Why did they stop feeding cows the round bails of Hay in Texas?

Because they weren't getting a square meal.

What's the difference between a bull and a cow?

A bull smiles when you milk it.

Why did the cow win a Nobel Prize?

Because he was out standing in his field.

How do you turn a fox into a cow?

Marry it

What happens when you find bones on the moon?

The cow didn't make it.

What do you call a cow that has given birth?

Decalfinated.

What do you call a cow that plays with itself?

Beef Stroganoff

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Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

How did I know my joke was not alright with my audience?

They all left.

Why aren't cowboy jokes funny?

Ya herd one, ya herd em all.

Write Jokes More Write Jokes

What's yellow and writes?

A ball point banana!

Why can't anxious people walk on tight ropes?

Because they're too high-strung. Corny I know, but I wrote it myself and had to put it out there.

Hit Jokes More Hit Jokes

What did Apply say to the iPhone 7?

Hit the road, Jack.

Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?

He was looking for Pooh. - *My little brother told me this one hit me with a little bit of nostalgia.*

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

Where do bees go on their day off?

To the wax museum.

What will I have at the end of the day?

Three bags of skittles and a small body to hide.

3 Leg Jokes More 3 Leg Jokes

What do you call a cat with 3 legs?

A handicat

What do you call an antelope with 3 legs?

A slantelope.

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What is the worst joke you have ever Heard?

I'll start it off: Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The Ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

What is the best offensive joke you have? Can you make me laugh?

Read all the other threads. I need new content. The old stuff is getting, well old. Here's my contribution. Have you head of the new drinking game? The mike brown special: stand there and take 12 shots. What's the difference between mike brown and a college kid? College kids can handle more shots before they fall down.

Train Jokes More Train Jokes

Cow Jokes

What do you call a cow with a twitch?

Couple's Daily Question Mug

When do cows go to sleep?

How do you call a cow with no legs?

What do you call a cow who just gave birth?

What happens when you seduce a cow?

Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?

What do you call a cow with five legs?

What do you call a cow with three legs?

What did the cow say to the other cow?

What happens when a cow jumps over barbed wire?

What do cows do on Sundays?

I Love Pizza & You

What do you call a Cow on the moon?

How did the cow feel when it couldn't produce milk?

Why do cows have bells?

What do you call a cross between a penguin and a cow?

How do you count cows?

What has four legs and goes 'Boo'?

Why did the cow tip over?

Why did the cows cross the road?

What's the difference between 9/11 and a cow?

Why did the cow return to the marijuana field?

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

What do cows sit on?

What do you call a cow in a 6 second video?

Why did the cow explode?

What do you call a cow during an earthquake?

What is the most certain way to prevent milk from souring?

What do you call cows that are best friends?

What do you call a cow having a seizure?

What kind of newspaper do cows read?

What happens when you give a cow a joint?

What drugs do cows take?

Love Card

How do cows do math?

How do cows go from one town to another?

What is a better name for cows?

How do cows move in groups?

What do you get when you cross a cow with an octopus?

What do you call a cow that will go down in history?

Why do cows wear bells around their necks?

Why did the milking stool only have three legs?

Where do cows go on movie night?

How can working with cow hide help on a first date?

What do you call a cow stuck in a hurricane?

How do you make beef stew?

What do you tell a cow blocking a road?

What do you call a cow that just had a baby?

Why don't cows play poker?

What did the cow say to the hay?

Why did the cows return to the marijuana field?

What does a cow say in the winter?

What's the difference between slavery and a cow?

What makes cows and horses so valuable?

What do you call a cow with two legs?

What do you call a cow with only legs on one side?

What did the farmer say when he found dynamite in one of his cows?

Why don't cows smoke weed?

What did the cow is standing all alone in a field say?

What do you call a cow if he enjoys burgers?

What's the difference between a cow and The Bible?

What do you get if you walk under a cow?

What do you get when you sit under a cow?

What happened when the cow tried to milk itself?

What do you call a cow that can go 3000 feet per second?

What did the cow say to the police officer, giving a speeding ticket?

What do you call a cow stable in Egypt?

What did the cow say in winter?

Why did the Chihuahua laugh?

How does a cow quickly do math?

Where do cows go when they die?

What do you call a cow thats had a hysterectomy?

What did the farmer say when he tried to milk the cow, but nothing came out?

What do you call a cow that doesn't produce milk?

What did the cow say when she got hit by a car?

Why did the cow get a job at Google?

Why did the cow slap the bull?

What do you call a moving company owned by cows?