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Which movie is on every man's bucket list?

Die Hard

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Why did Vivaldi die poor?

Because he was baroque.

Why was Jesus a virgin when he died?

Every time he touched a "wound" it closed.

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What movie did Leonardo DiCaprio's dog recently star in?

The Woof of Wall Street.

What's going on in this movie?

Him: Lin, I just hit play 90 seconds ago. Me: Wow! New record.