Why did Amy Schumer go to a psychic?

Because it's the only way she'll ever get near a medium.

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What did the baby elephant get when the daddy elephant sneezed?

Out of the way!

Why did the witch lose her way?

Because her hat was pointing in the wrong direction.

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Why did Amy Schumer go to a psychic?

Because it's the only way she'll ever get near a medium.

Why couldn't Barbie get pregnant?

Because they cast Amy Schumer and Ken couldn't get the job done.

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What is the media of choice for the mallard?

Lololololololol-- --lololololol

Why couldn't the fortune teller fit into her shirt?

Because she's a medium