Why did Princess Diana divorce Prince Charles?

She was always told a ruler was 12 inches!

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How do you make a Gorilla laugh?

Tell it an elephant joke!

How can you tell when you are talking to an extroverted engineer?

They look at your feet instead of theirs.

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Why did Princess Diana divorce Prince Charles?

She was always told a ruler was 12 inches!

What do you get when you cross the Queen and Prince Charles?

Dead in a tunnel.

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What's the difference between Pink Floyd and Princess Diana?

Pink Floyd kept going after the wall.

What's the difference between a Volvo and a Mercedes?

Princess Diana wouldn't be caught dead in a Volvo

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Why did Princess Diana divorce Prince Charles?

She was always told a ruler was 12 inches!

What is white, 12 inches long, and not a fluorescent light bulb?

Nothing.

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Why did the girl take a ruler to bed?

She wanted to see how long she slept.

Why did the clock phone the ruler?

Because desperate times call for desperate measures....