How can you tell when Dracula is sick?

By his coughin'

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How can you tell if a California State coed is a good cook?

She can get the pop tart out of the toaster in one piece.

What did he tell people in order to make them avoid taking it?

Eschew! Eschew!

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Where does Dracula buy his pencils?

Pennsylvania.

Why does Dracula always travel with his coffin?

Because his life is at stake.

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What did one coffin say to the other?

Is that you coughin'

How can you tell when Dracula is sick?

By his coughin'