Why didn't you give me anything for my birthday?

GirlFriend: You told me to surprise you.

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why do they thank me in the cafeteria when I pay for my food like I had a choice?

Just tell me "enjoy the diarrhea" and I'll move along.

How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb?

Idk, its too dark to tell them apart.

Birthday Jokes More Birthday Jokes

What did Darth Vader say to Luke on his birthday?

I know what you're going to get, I felt your presents

How old were you on your last birthday?

Eight. And how old will you be on your next birthday Ten. Oh I don't think that's possible. Oh yes it is - I'm nine today.

Surprise Jokes More Surprise Jokes

Why didn't you give me anything for my birthday?

GirlFriend: You told me to surprise you.

How do you surprise Helen Keller?

Leave the plunger in the toilet