Why did the doorman get a raise?

He was always out standing.

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Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

What do the Dallas Cowboys and the Rev. Billie Graham have in common?

Both can make 70,000 people stand up and shout "JESUS CHRIST!"

Why was the monster standing on his head?

He was turning things over in his mind.

Raise Jokes More Raise Jokes

When is the best time to raise money?

When there's a stripper in front of you.

Why couldn't the woman buy a bakery shop?

She couldn't raise enough dough.