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Why did the monster lie on his back?

To trip up low-flying aircraft.

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Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

His lips are moving.

How can you tell when Mitt Romney is lying?

His mouth is moving.

Fly Jokes More Fly Jokes

What is the difference between a terrorist hideout and a school?

How should I know? I just fly the drones.

Why don't seagulls fly by the bay?

Because then they would be called Bagels!

Trip Jokes More Trip Jokes

I bought some shoes from a drug dealer.

I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!

How was your trip to Israel?

This month they had Sukkot (the festival of tabernacles) It was pretty "in tents".

Monster Jokes More Monster Jokes

What would you get if you crossed a monster with a Thanksgiving dessert?

Bumpkin pie!

What has 100 teeth and holds back a monster?

My zipper.