Why does John Cena always take awhile to feel better when he's sick?

Because the Doctor can never see him.

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Why was Lindsay Lohan feeling sleepy?

He was buying drinks.

How can you tell if your goose is depressed?

It's feeling down.

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What's worse than your doctor telling you that you have gonorrhea?

Getting the news from your dentist

What did the router say to the doctor?

It hurts when IP.

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When does John Cena get scared?

When John CENA ghost!

Who would win in a fight between John Cena and Chuck Norris?

Depends on who wrote the script.