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Why doesn't Ronald Reagan drink orange juice?

Because he's dead.

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When drinking liquor while watching baseball, at what point will you be the most drunk?

Bottom of the fifth, of course.

Who makes a drinking sound like this *makes drinking sound*?

GEORGE GRASHINGTON!

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Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice?

Because it said concentrate.

What do you call books about orange juice?

Q: What do you call books about orange juice? A:

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What would Ronald Reagan be doing if he were alive today?

He'd be scratching at the lid of his coffin yelling, "Let me out! I'm alive! Let me out!!"

What's Ronald Reagan's favorite vegetable?

James Brady