Why is mild cheddar even a thing?

Who are these people who can't handle sharp cheddar & why are they allowed to influence the cheese market

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Why do people always talk in absolutes?

I would never do that. It's the worst.

What do you call a Mexican Standoff between two people?

Juan vs. Juan

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Why isn't Sean Connery allowed to play Super Mario Bros. any more?

He kept trying to shave the princess.

Why are Jedis allowed to use negative numbers?

Because only Siths deal in absolutes.

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How do senior citizens handle indoor skydiving?

Depends

Why?

She: For starters I can't handle your silly jokes. He: Hmm okay and for main course