Why was Pinocchio acting drunk?

He couldn't handle his lacquer

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Act Jokes More Act Jokes

Why can't an IT guy be a doctor?

Nurse: Doctor, the patient's life support is acting strange... Doctor: Have you tried turning it off and on again?

What do you call it when a person acts holy for a night then sins every day after?

A one night stand with Jesus

Handle Jokes More Handle Jokes

What is the best tool for getting a handle on your gambling addiction?

A vice grip.

Why did the alcoholic quit his acting career when the audience jeered at him?

He couldn't handle his boos.

Pinocchio Jokes More Pinocchio Jokes

When did Pinocchio learn he was made of wood?

When his hand caught fire!!

Where is Pinocchio's website?

On the splinternet.