Pinocchio Jokes

What did Pinocchio say to Rudolph when he asked him what he asked for Christmas?

Quit being nosey.

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Why was Pinocchio acting drunk?

He couldn't handle his lacquer

Why did they kick Raggedy Anne out of the toybox?

She kept on sitting on Pinocchio's face yelling "Lie to me... lie to me!"

How did Pinocchio realize he was made of wood?

His hand caught on fire.

When did Pinocchio learn he was made of wood?

When his hand caught fire!!

Why did all the other toys throw RaggedyAnn out of the toy box?

She kept on sitting on Pinocchio's face yelling "Lie to me, lie to me!"

Why did Raggedy Anne get kicked out of the toybox?

She kept sitting on Pinocchio's face and screaming "Lie to me! Lie to me!!!"

Where is Pinocchio's website?

On the splinternet.

Why would Pinocchio make a bad criminal?

He wasn't cut out for this.

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Ann Jokes More Ann Jokes

Who's there! Ann! Ann who?

Ann-onymous!

Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

Which side is it best to lie on?

She asked. "The side that pays your fee" replied the doctor.

Why has no one invented a device where I can move myself around from place to place while lying in a hammock?

I remember when we used to make stuff in this lazy country!

Act Jokes More Act Jokes

What's the difference between a politician and an actor?

One acts solely for money, the other is the actor.

What do you call 2 ducks who walk like, act like, and believe they are geese?

A paradux

Toybox Jokes More Toybox Jokes

Why did they kick Raggedy Anne out of the toybox?

She kept on sitting on Pinocchio's face yelling "Lie to me... lie to me!"

Why did Raggedy Anne get kicked out of the toybox?

She kept sitting on Pinocchio's face and screaming "Lie to me! Lie to me!!!"

Real Boy Jokes More Real Boy Jokes

Truth Jokes More Truth Jokes

What did I tell you about telling the truth?

5-year-old: It's only for people who don't have lawyers.

How many conspiracy theorists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

We may never know the truth.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What's the hardest thing about being a vegan crossfitter who went to Harvard?

Figuring out what to tell you about first.

Why did the farmer hang raincoats all over his orchard?

Someone told him he should get an apple Mac

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What do you get when you cross Christmas and a Duck?

A Christmas-Quacker!

What does Dracula write on his Christmas cards?

Best vicious of the season