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Why were the proctologist's emails so hard to read?

Too many colons.

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What did the Irishman text his Wife?

Honey I'm down at the pub having a pint with the lads. Be home in about 30 min. If I'm not back by then please read this message again.

How to you read a book?

Just reddit.

Colon Jokes More Colon Jokes

Who would want a "Semi" tattoo on their colon?

Not that there's anything wrong with that....

What do computer programmers and aged-care nurses have in common?

They both worry about the position of colons.