How do you know whether somebody is a vegan?

Don't worry, they'll tell you.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What time is it?

I don't know... it keeps changing.

How do you know your house had chicken pox?

It has shingles.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why do Marlboro cigarettes have white filters in America, but yellow filters in Europe?

So Keith Richards can tell which continent he's in.

Who's there! Billy Bragg! Billy Bragg who?

Billy Braggs too much tell him to stop it!

Vegan Jokes More Vegan Jokes

How can you tell someone is vegan?

Don't worry, they'll tell you

What's the difference between a vegan, a crossfit instructor, and a psychological test subject?

The test subject is the only one you'd willingly ask to "tell us about yourself."

Worry Jokes More Worry Jokes

What did the couch say to the armchair?

Don't worry, I pull out.

How did Warren Buffets company survive the economic meltdown?

It's a trade secret, but don't worry, Berkshire Hathaway

Somebody Jokes More Somebody Jokes

What do you call somebody who is content being average sized?

A happy medium.

Why did the washing machine stop?

Somebody threw the towel in.