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How did the toad feel in the morning?

A little bit froggy

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Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

What do you call feeling bad about watching lame reality TV shows?

Survivor guilt.

What did Jay Z say to Beyonce after having an ice cream shoved up his arse?

I'm feeling a bit sorbet.

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

The Sergeant-Major growled at the young soldier: I didn’t see you at camouflage training this morning.

Thank you very much, sir.

What do you call a rooster who wakes you up at the same time every morning?

An alarm cluck!

Toad Jokes More Toad Jokes

Why did you put a toad in your sister's bed?

Son: I couldn't find a spider.

Why wouldn't the sow let her piglets play with toads?

She didn't want them to grow into wart hogs.