How do pirates measure rope?

In yarr'ds.

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Pirate Jokes More Pirate Jokes

Whats with the wheel on your john?

The pirate replied, "Arrg it's driving me nuts!"

Which anti-virus software do pirates prefer?

Avast, ye scurvy dogs!

Measure Jokes More Measure Jokes

How do you measure a Lego figure's shoe size?

In square feet.

How do you measure pain?

In Hertz.

Rope Jokes More Rope Jokes

Why do sailors give their wives a bouqet of ropes instead of flowers?

It's a bouqet of forget-me-knots.

Which wrestler do the Gorillas admire most?

Gorilla Monsoon - he knows the ropes!